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Advice Please...


Guest Lunar_Scorpion
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I need to get someone who wronged me out of my head. I would preferably like a bit of revenge, too. I have never done any kind of witchcraft before so preferably something simple that can be done with paper, pens and those little tealight candles!

 

If you need or would like more information about the situiation then just ask, it's quite complicated and it would take me a while to explain the whole thing in one go!

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ok lay it one me i tend not to any type of magic to harm anyone,but then i believe in the 3 fold rule,but i might be able to help in other ways just message me....

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If you've never worked like this before (with witchcraft or any other pagan path) then may I respectfully suggest you don't start just now? At least, not for these reasons... If you try to shut someone away from you using witchcraft without first having had a basic grounding in the mechanics of spellcasting and defense then the chances are you'll end up binding yourself to them in some way or finding that what you are trying to accomplish backfires on you in some way.

 

But thats not to say there's nothing you can do about it :o First of all, deal with your desire for revenge. Look long and hard at what exactly you want revenge for and why you want it - if its just wounded pride, deal with it yourself. No-one else can see that wound and if you can't heal it then no amount of revenge will. If you just want a bit of 'get your own back', go for signing them up to every mail order catalogue, double glazing company and field marketing group you can think of or something like that... :(

 

Now that you've got the revenge bit out of your system, its time to sever your ties with them. To do this you must be sure you are severing these ties for the right reasons. Again, this requires a good deal of soul-searching and not a little facing up to your own intentions. If you are absolutely sure you want to get them out of your head, write down everything you can about them and the situation which led to you wanting rid of their presence in your life and burn the whole lot. All of it. The burning will give you a tangible point at which you decided they no longer have any place in your thoughts. After that its up to you not to slip back into old thought patterns and keep coming back to the same point over and over. If you find yourself mulling over it again and again, force yourself out of it. Get up and go for a walk, listen to something very loud or read a book with an involved plot which you have to concentrate on.

 

In other words, no magic can release their hold on you. You can though. Go to it :)

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Oh well I was going to reply but since Oxon has fabulously summed up my thoughts I won't bother :o

 

If you've never worked like this before (with witchcraft or any other pagan path) then may I respectfully suggest you don't start just now?

 

Too right missus :) :(

 

Learn to walk before you run :)

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I haven't done any witchcraft before because I have never felt the need to. I have done some research, so it's not as if I'm a complete newbie. This situation has just gone on too long and I need to get it all out of my system - I thought I was over it, but then the thoughts come back to haunt me. What he did to me feels like he took a bit of my soul, I've done my best not to let it get to me but it does. I keep feeling the need to "do" something, I just don't know what...

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About severing the ties - he pretty much made crystal clear to me that he wanted nothing to do with me. It's just the experiences I had with him are rather emotional ones and I don't seem to be able to let go. Maybe I just want to do something to him and get away with it in the same way that he has got away with what he did to me.

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I wouldn't say that some research is a good enough basis for doing something like this. As Oxon's said, it could end up strengthening the bonds that you are actually trying to sever.

 

Writing things down and burning them is good. As is screaming, and breaking things. Throwing stones into the sea, smashing plates - that's my favourite :( - alongside a little visualisation of each plate broken or stone thrown is a hold this guy has over you.

 

Magic isn't needed for things like this, not until all other options have been exhausted.

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I've done my best not to let it get to me but it does. I keep feeling the need to "do" something, I just don't know what...

 

In that case, go defensive rather than offensive. By that I mean work on your confidence, protect yourself, reassure yourself that this person is no longer a threat to you and that there is no way he can have stolen any part of you. Part of you may have gone into hiding if you've been hurt badly enough, but it won't have been stolen... Its generally a mistake to take an offensive course of action if you don't know what you want to do/achieve and you're not quite sure how to go about it.

 

I stand by the advice I gave in my previous post with the mundane methods of dealing with this problem - magic can't accomplish what you can't see a way to do yourself. All a spell is is a way of directing your intent through your will (making what you want to happen, happen by the use of your strength of purpose). But protecting yourself, working on your own energy and your strength, will help you to block this person from your mind. You've said that he wants nothing more to do with the situation, so you know that its you who is keeping the connection open, not him. Devote a little time whenever you can to picturing yourself happy and completely free from any bonds that you are not happy to retain.

 

If as you say you are just becoming a little obsessed with the idea of doing something to him and getting away with it, I simply reiterate what I said before.

 

Look long and hard at what exactly you want revenge for and why you want it - if its just wounded pride, deal with it yourself. No-one else can see that wound and if you can't heal it then no amount of revenge will.

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i've been in a situation like this but wiht magic you need a clear head,so spells just wouldn't work.the only thing i could suggest is that you get rid of anything that reminds you of him,do a house cleansing(if he lived with you) and try,it's hard to move on/

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I don't have anything that reminds me of him - it's just when I'm in a certain state of mind or watch certain things on TV or in a film.

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I haven't done any witchcraft before because I have never felt the need to.

You also need to look at why you think witchcraft would help you. The first rule of witchcraft whether you are seeking to hex or heal or change things is to look at the mundane first. What can you change about yourself, the situation etc.

 

I wonder if inside you still care about him? In my opinion it would be more dangerous for you to try magic against him before healing yourself. I was in an abusive marriage, you have to be well on the way of healing yourself so that your revenge if you still feel you need it then is hard hitting - on him not you. If you are having problems because you never got the answers you need (as in WHY me?) then you will never get those answers, for there is no reason.

 

I realise we are not giving you the answers you want, but there is more problem to yourself within badly worked magic than he could ever do against you. I wish you to understand this, it would be irresponsible of us to hand you the magic answers on a plate, magic doesn't work like that and it takes a long time of study and practice.

 

Be at peace ;)

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I guess you're right... In fact I know you are. I wish there was just a short simple answer to everything. I feel so drained because things seem to take so much time and effort - I need some rest from it all!

 

(Hopefully) I will have the opportunity to work on my confidence etc. in th near future, but in the meantime I will have to find some way of signing him up for junk mail...

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Junk mail, I approve of that idea ;)

 

Something that helps you work both on learning your own strengths and weaknesses and helps you to cope with things is visualisation and meditation. In areas of your making you can find your own magic and Pagan ways, it is also very healing too :lol:

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I don't quite know your situation but maybe this will help.

I split with my partner about seven months ago, and a while back I had convinced myself I was over him but at the same time I was really bitter about all sorts of things to do with the situation, and was waiting for the day that he and his new girlfriend would split up - not cos I wanted him back; just because I wanted him to suffer.

At the same time, I was redecorating. I was busy stripping wallpaper and thinking and I realised that all these thoughts weren't helping me in any way, and until I'd got rid of them I would never be able to properly move on myself. I'd got stuck into a rut of obsessing about it, and I didn't want to any more.

So, I dedicated each strip of wallpaper to a particular feeling or thing I was pissed off about and didn't want to be pissed off about anymore, and ripped it all away!

I put so much intent into it, I was exhausted at the end, but it really did work. I felt better straight away and have ever since. :o_hail:

I suppose what I'm trying to say is maybe instead of focussing any more attention on him, you need to concentrate on healing yourself, as you're far more important than he is :o_hail:

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Well a small ritual cleansing on yourself wouldnt go amiss here, tis a good way to find your first feet with magiks ...afor you try the clever stuff...;)

 

You have the optimum oppertunity with the fantastic ,full, hunters moon comin up on thursday too ...its already a stunner an have done a wee bit of moon bathin meself today.

Hunters moon is the brightest moon of the year.

Take yourself out into your garden or some place private and caste a circle of salt around you.

Salt is a good circle for beginers, its a phisical barrier to keep out negative an harmfull entities, you dont wanna be pestered by the non mortal either :D

Take some time to just sit an feel the strength from the land beneath you, feel how strong she is an listen to her heartbeat.

Tis always best to work with the tools that you know best, and the land is known to all of us.

She will do her stuff.

 

Take time to sit an bath in the rays of the moon an draw them rays into you, draw them in through your head, hold up your arms an draw them up through your hands too, feel them drawing through your body an taking away all the darknes.

Let the darkness flow out through your feet an legs where you sit into the land.

 

Keep doing this untill all that runs through you is clean moon energy, all the darkness is soaked away beneath you. (crying is optional ;) )

 

When you feel cleansed through, thank the land for her assistance an the moon goddess for hers too. Sweep aside your circle an go do something that makes you feel good.

You can do this as often as you want.

Give yourself a chance to heal.

 

If it still burning after a few trys at cleansin, and you feel you have aquired enough practice, then hex him with anal warts over an over, untill you feel better..:)

 

Take care honey...men ...stch

 

Rain

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Take care honey...men ...stch

Hmmmm. Well nobody knows what he has done, so Im not sure about the above comment. ;) Other than that I think a little self cleansing is a good idea!

 

Really want to say how much I agree with Oxonpagan here. Very good advice. Revenge may be sweet, but has a tendency to backfire unless you know what you are doing. The working of magic is not about research.....it is about practice! Dont let the first time you work energy be to try to get revenge.

 

Maybe a time of reflection is in order. Work out exactly how you feel, and what lessons you have learned from your experience.....then work out how it can make you a stronger person.

 

I wish you all the best in gaining confidence and I am a great believer that confidence is a skill like most things and can be learned and gained by most people.

 

All the best to you

 

mike

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Lunar...

 

This is something that should help... and is something u can do path or not... Im sure that we've all burnt photos of x's to help get him/her out of our systems... so let me suggest this. Write his name on a piece of paper. Write down where he lives... write down what he did to u. Burn the piece of paper.... imagine with the burning paper.. all the grief he's caused you burning out of your system. When paper is completely ash... take to a favourite place and let those ashes scatter to the winds.

 

Most refreshing. Hopefully wont offend those on here who rightly point out not to start into this for these reasons... but this is a simple "closure" rite... usually works a treat.

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Xalle, that is a very good idea, I've done the same with various problems, it's cleansing and healing as well.

 

Pebble, I like the wallpaper therapy, when I go to the bottle bank, I dedicate each bottle to a problem or irritation, be it stupid drivers, ignorant hospital consultations, etc. The feeling of release as each bottle smashes its way down is utterly great and utterly blissful :o_lol:

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The positivity of wicca and witchcraft is something only a person who has been practising knows. Many hold christian concepts of the craft without being aware of it. Yes, witches hex, yes witches do spells but in the craft its the positive that reigns. By positive I don't mean that there isn't any bad or evil but that the understanding of the acceptance that both bad and good have purpose in existence.

 

My suggestion to get out of the negativity of the memories of this situation is to wrap colours, sounds, tastes, feelings, and thoughts of all that you find positive around you. Wrap yourself in memories of the positive, in hope for the future of positive dreams and in realisation of the positive that is around you now.

 

Wiccans, witches and practioners of magick aren't ugly, beligerent, crumudgeons - they are wonderous, contented winners with some mighty magickal powers. :o_yikes:

 

Blessings

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Thanks Rain and Xalle. I will do that. I think tonight would be better for the Moon thing because the Full Moon is early morning, and I think that Wednesday would be a better day for me.

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That makes no difference to magical workings :o_bounce2:

Absolutely true. Lunar, this is one of the reasons I suggested you didn't start magical workings just yet. Research will take you so far (believe me I'm talking from personal experience here) but it won't give you the knowledge that a grounding in working at a basic level will give you. Unless you understand why the moon will aid you in a spell or ritual, then there is no point in trying to use it.

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It would be more comfortable for me to actually see the Moon. Most of the time I couldn't even see the light through the clouds. To me it would be like speaking to someone on the telephone when you really want to see them face to face.

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So if this is the case then how would you work with the Dark Moon one of the most powerful moon times for many witches? You can't see the Dark Moon.

 

You realise that the physical moon body is merely symbolic don't you?

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Tis said that the best revenge is Happiness.

When relationships come to an end even if they wasnt good we go into a type of grieving not neccessarily for the person but for us.And can be left with negative feelings of ourselves and all the whys and what ifs.

Take this time to get in touch with yourself and spend some time pampering and revitalising yourself with oil scented baths , music whatever lifts you.

You can train yourself to stop your thoughts and to say no when they come creeping up on you.

And if you have whys and what ifs acknowledge them and how they made you feel and what the situation was that brought these feelings. You cannot change the past but with all you learn from yourself you will have a happier future.

Be happy and let your Happiness and new confidence be your revenge

BB

Mink

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I wouldn't waste your time contributing to this thread folks. I don't think Lunar really listens to people or takes things that people say on board. After the shameful Abortion thread, I seriously doubt this situation is real anyway. I think we are all being baited in an attempt to increase Lunar's sense of self importance.

 

Don't do magic Lunar. You are not experienced and evidently do not have anywhere near enough knowledge. Go and think about what you really believe. Grow up. Youre as transparent as clingfilm.

 

mike

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A friend sent this to me yesterday, he thought I might need it....might help anyone else too.

 

"1 List your lovers.

It's best to do this in a physical form. Do not judge how long or how short your list is; simply reflect on it and how you feel about all these past and/or present partner(s). Do any of these relationships stick out as encounters that still need to be healed? Be honest with yourself.

2 Go to your place of power.

Use whatever grounding and centering techniques you are most familiar and comfortable with or simply sit quietly, in a place where you will not be disturbed, and pay attention to your breath. After a few minutes, you will be ready to proceed. Now send yourself, mentally, to your place of power and call upon your chosen deity or deities for assistance. Ask for their help in this ritual and follow any instructions that they give you.

 

3 Let your lovers go.

Now imagine a doorway before you. The god(s) and/or goddess(es) you have called stand between you and the doorway. Now call out to the first name on your list of past lovers. Ask their Higher Self to be present. See your lover appear in the doorway; if you have any unfinished things to say to them or questions to ask, do so now. When you feel closure with this person, move away from the door and see a shimmering rainbow appear between you and your former love. Now face them and say "I thank you for our time together and for the gifts you have given me. I now release any parts of you I may still be carrying, for the highest good of all."

 

4 Reclaim your energy.

Exhale and say, "I now reclaim any parts of myself that should be with me, for the highest good of all." Inhale deeply, and feel your power move toward you from your ex. As it moves towards you, it passes through the rainbow and is cleansed before entering your body. Imagine the God/dess using a sword to sever any unhealthy cords of energy between you and your former lover. Thank you lover's Higher Self, and watch as s/he moves through the doorway and disappears.

 

5 Say farewell.

Thank the God/dess and ground yourself as needed. When you are finished with the entire list, burn it and dispose of the ashes in running water (a public bathroom will do, don't pollute!).

 

Every time you express your sexuality, you are expressing spiritual, psychic, and magical energy. A good witch becomes conscious of it and uses each experience to bring a greater state of healing and balance."

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Sorry, I've come into this one a little late, but if you haven't done any witchcraft before, why do you think that you'd be able to use it now to any great effect? It's not like trying a recipe for the first time, it takes a lot of practice and hard work, and I'm sorry if that sounds like I'm pontificating, I just don't think that simply wanting a bit of revenge and an opportunity to use tea-lights is really going to, er, wave the magic wand in this scenario...

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It is a real situation and I do listen to people and take what they say on board... I've decided not to do any witchcraft, I will just have to deal with it and hopefully get over it with counselling.

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