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Galaemar Laerareon

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Integrating It All? Maybe?


Guest Sorrel
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My father has a 'high' church of England background. From that I've gleaned a mystical connection with the music of the Latin mass [but not the dogma behind it].

 

In my late 20s I had an obsession with a yoga sect that promoted the power of the Feminine/Goddess - because my father had a thing against women priests, also women in general, and I needed to empower myself.

 

As I'd got deeply embroiled in the sect, and, due to my fragile emotional health, I overused the practices in an attempt to make myself 'pure' and acceptable..but it only ended up making me more unwell. Then, when I began depth psychotherapeutic work, I disengaged from the sect and it's practices.

 

Only recently have I started to reconnect with the Goddess again [mainly Tara], but in my own ways.

 

More recently I came across the ideals of Wicca, and 'Harm None' has a particular resonance for me, living as I do with the residues of being an abuse survivor - which impacts on both myself and others.

 

I tend to describe the path that I follow as Pantheism, being as my perspective encompasses so much, and I have always felt a deep connection with the sanctity of nature and space. But maybe it's not the best path to describe the, as yet, shaky path that I follow? One of my ideals is integrity, and I don't want to say I follow a path, and it's not the right description...

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Sweetheart, isthis something personal you want to put into a blog, or do we want to discuss it with others in the Valley? If you want to discuss it, I'm a little unsure what your question is.

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MH, Sorrel'll correct me if I'm wrong, but I took it to mean that she wondered if Pantheism was the best description for her path... :huh:

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Sorrel, if that *is* your question then perhaps Pantheism is the word that fits, as that's seeing the divine in the universe. It sounds though as though your path is fairly eclectic, so maybe the best word to describe it is "Sorrelism" :D

 

Do you need a word to describe it though? If you said you were Pagan, or Eclectic, would that not be descriptive enough?

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Hi Sorrel, nice to meet you :) I liked your post. I also am a pantheist and a Goddess-devotee (Shakta) - since I also am a polytheist worshipping the Aesir & Vanir and base my religion on Vedic-Germanic commonalities, I call myself 'esoteric Heathen' :o_wink: took me a while to figure that one out! :))

I understand the aversion against labelling which a lot of Pagans have (because more often than not the label insufficiently describes the thing itself); however naming something can be empowering and the exercise of trying to find a name for your path can lead you into deeper understanding of it.

May your path lead you to happiness!

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Thanks all. :)

 

Pomona, yes, that indeed is my question..

 

I'll respond in more detail later..

 

But yes, I would like to discuss this. It is important to me to have a sense of what my path actually can be called in terms of 'how the world sees it', though of course 'Sorrelism' would be the best. :)

 

Much as I have the usual conundrum when explaining my clinical diagnosis [it doesn't include everything I live with] having a validated term, as it were, for my spiritual path is necessary to me.

 

Seeing as I don't ascribe to ritual, spells etc, Wicca is not totally my path. And seeing as I have a strong Goddess streak, I'm not sure that Pantheism includes that?

 

And, forgive me in advance, but because I am influenced by eg the Kyrie, aspects of Buddhism and Hinduism, I couldn't rightfully describe my path as pure Pagan. Yes, it's eclectic, but agh, that's ok, right?

 

And - how could I start honouring my path?

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........ but a label will always be a little bit unsatisfactory won't it, because a single word can never fully describe the richness of a persons spirituality. It sounds like you have had a "Pendulum" past swinging from one extreme to the other, but that you are beginning to find your place somewhere in the middle. Its great that you, as a pagan, are starting to feel free enough to define yourself and not be trapped by the dogma of others. And it is good that you are freeing yourself from the "sexist" creed which so many seem to fall for. Balance is all! I'm glad for you.

 

We posted simultaneously. The best way to honour your path is to tread it with integrity and not worry about how others see it. What others think is really neither here nor there...... you path is there to express your spirituality, not to please others. I know this seems a bit like ice skating without holding on to the sides, but it gets easier with time!

 

Mike

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Thank you Mike.

 

I guess I have a really BIG thing about being scared about not being valid, acceptable, etc, still...

 

Also, it's one thing following my own path, yet at the same time I also want to be part of a group with at least similar ideals.. Hence me being here, really..

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I can assure you that there are many here who will know exactly what you mean. I am simply a Pagan and there are many here who call themselves that because none of the more established paths really fit them. If you are talking groups then you are part of the largest Pagan group of all. The great thing about Paganism is that it has broad enough shoulders for us all and for many of us that just means being pagan. Why not have a go with that label for a while and see how it fits....... if, later on, you feel that a more specific term would be a better description then you can use it. There is no rush, and no "one chance" to pick a label. You can change how you define yourself until you are a little old lady if you want because in Paganism that is not necessarily seen as a negative thing...... more a sign that a persons spiritual expression evolves and changes at a quicker pace. I am simply Pagan, and so are many others on this site....... it doesn't mean being isolated from other Pagans in the slightest.

 

Mike

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To be honest, I'm not sure I'd be able to apply a label of an existing path to your beliefs. It's such a rich, personal mix of elements from various beliefs, religions and experiences that apply to you and that particular mix belongs to you and you alone I suspect. And why wouldn't it be Pagan? The term encompasses so much, so many elements from different paths and traditions, that there is no agreement or consensus on what the word actually means. And so what if you don't think you can call yourself Pagan - surely the point is that it's better to follow something that's true to yourself rather than trying to shoehorn your way into a shape that doesn't really fit, simply for the sake of having a label?

 

I know people who worship a Divine Feminine, who follow the teachings of Buddha, who see themselves as Pantheist, Duo-theist, Polytheist and Atheist. Some of them self-identify as Pagans, some don't. They see themselves as spiritual and for them, that's enough :)

 

As for how you start honouring your path, I think the best thing you can do is walk it. So if you know what you believe you can look with intent about what you might want to do to honour the gods, to honour the earth, to honour yourself.

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Thank you. :)

 

I have a long history of 'not fitting in', so this makes me insecure and doubtful upon entry into new things. Well, in gathering together what I've always had. It's a relief to have the freedom to believe what I believe, and not have to try and accept beliefs that don't fit for me.

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